"I just crush a lot..."

So I think I have a crush...on my ENTIRE Ob/Gyn practice. I feel like a junior high school girl around the class cutie every time I have to go in for a visit. I do a lot of blushing and a lot of smiling and a lot of batting of the eyelashes. It is guaranteed that I will see someone who knows me and my story very well, since every single one of the drs. and midwives visited me while I was in the hospital.

Yesterday I did see one of my favorite drs. During my visit, Will started fussing. While we were talking, my dr. just reached down and picked Will up out of his carrier and held him in the football hold while we chatted. Afterwards, he told me he'd take Will with him out of the room while I got myself together.

I just love that my doctors feel so comfortable with me and so connected to Will because they all had a hand in saving him.

Baby Love

Sometimes I can't believe I'm a mom. In some ways I still feel like I'm 18 and babysitting. I look at Will and think, "There is no way that I could have produced a human being." I feel like his mom is going to come at the end of the day to pick him up. Its just so surreal to think that I am somebody's mother; I am the one that this baby wants when he cries; I am the one who provides him with food and nourishment; I am the one that his eyes light up for when he sees me walk into a room. Me. Me. Its just so amazing and so humbling. The bewildering thing is that I probably need him more than he needs me...

"The Cheese Stands (or Sits) Alone..."